helping children cope with separation and divorce

Divorce occurs in adults – but family disintegration can have profound effects on children as well. Your child may feel as if his world has turned upside down but do not be sad. There is good news.

Here are ways helping children cope with separation and divorce.

• How to tell the child about divorce

It is better for both you and your husband to tell him about your divorce. Speaking frankly and simply and going far from the ugly details. You can say “there is a misunderstanding between me and your mother (or your father) so we think it would be better for us to divorce.” Make sure your child is aware that he is not the reason for divorce and that both of his parents love him so much.

• Expect reactions

At first, your child may be more interested in some things. Where will I live? Do I need to change school? Who will take me to the swimming lessons? While the issues of divorce are arranged, try to keep your child’s routine as good as possible or quickly set up a new routine. Knowing what to expect helping children cope with separation and divorce.

• Keep your child out of the problems

Respecting your child’s relationship with his or her other parent may help the child adapt to divorce. Consider the following general prohibitions:

• Do not speak badly about your husband in front of your child.
• Do not force your child to choose between you.
• Do not use your child as a messenger or mediator.
• Do not argue or discuss child care issues with your child.

• Put your child first

During a divorce, interacting with your spouse may be the last thing you want to do but it is important that your child needs both. Put the custody arrangements and other details with your child’s as your best interests in mind. This may mean meeting your child’s needs for your own needs.

Read also: Child Custody